Three Lessons I Learned in My Trial
“Take it, Jesus. Just take it.”
These had become common words in my vocabulary the winter that my sickness started to get out of control. I craved complete deliverance from disease, and I could not understand why God, the ultimate Healer, would not grant me that request. I knew He had all the power to remove my sickness in a heartbeat. I knew He could easily calm down the symptoms or even just let the medicine kick in, yet no matter how much I begged, He didn’t take away the pain.
My sister, who had just been inspired by another woman’s testimony, suggested that instead of asking God to remove the sickness, ask Him why it’s there. Ask God to show me why I was suffering. Ask God what purpose He had for all of the pain I was going through. A woman going through the pains of labor does not labor in vain. Instead, she will soon give birth to something beautiful and miraculous.
I began to change my prayer, “God, show me why. Why am I going through all of this pain? What is Your purpose for all of this?”
It was February of 2018. I had woken up in the middle of the night from yet another headache with the hopes that a shower would relieve the pain. The episode had gone on longer than ever before, marking four days in a row and so many nights without sleep that I could barely stand. My tears mixed with the water that ran over my head as I cried out to God, “Please, tell me why!”
He heard me. He answered.
“All of this pain, all of this suffering, this anguish, that you feel is how I have felt since you left me.”
It was then that I learned my first lesson from my trial:
That day, I was admitted to the hospital, desperate for relief. We often mistake a revelation from God as a grand finale to our trial, but He still had so much more to show me.
After a couple of days with no changes, a Holy Spirit filled pastor, nicknamed “The Wild Man”, made his way to come pray for me. I had this gut feeling that he was going to tell me to start jumping as a way to claim my healing, and I knew I would fail due to the pain.
Instead, when he arrived, he calmly told me the story of David in the Bible jumping around and praising God, even though his wife thought he was a fool. I realized then that regardless of how I felt, I needed to:
Outside of being prayed over in tongues, the pain still lingered as I laid in the hospital bed. My father in law sent me scripture after scripture to help me through. One of those scriptures simply being, “The Word is God.” Like a final piece to the puzzle, I knew how I had to change my life next:
After those three revelations, the doctors were finally able to get rid of the pain and eventually release me from the hospital. I had a new game plan for life, and I was thankful that God had used my experience to show me what areas I needed to fix in my life first.
I was so thankful, in fact, that after arriving home, I asked God for more. As crazy as it sounded, if this was what it took to grow closer to Him and to hear from Him, I wanted more. He had given me the strength to make it through, so I knew He could give me the strength again. It sounded foolish even to me, but suffering for His kingdom made it all worth it.
Soon after, that prayer was answered as well, giving way to the birth of my testimony.
“Not unto us, O Lord, not unto us, But to Your name give glory, Because of Your mercy, Because of Your truth.”
– Psalms 115:1 NKJV
What is God showing you?
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2 Comments
Jeffrey Barca
April, I have never been more proud than I am of you this day. Your trials have become your testimony. We all need a testimony to bring light to this lost world. I am thankful that you have found your way and a new purpose to fulfill His purpose. Thank you so much for reaching out to me and sharing your testimony. I have subscribed and look forward to anything new that you share.
God bless.
April Normand
Thank you so much for your support and guidance! Let God’s will continue to shine more than our own!